#55. Should people make important decisions alone?
Important decisions are those that will have a significant or lasting impact on a person's life. Oftentimes such a decision is difficult to make because the consequences are considerable or because the decision's circumstances and implications are complex. As a result, people will consult friends and family for their opinions to get a better understanding of the situation. Seeking advice is helpful because it helps to avoid pitfalls and precludes carelessness, but in the end the person who has to live with the decision should make it by himself/ herself.
Discussing important decisions with others can be beneficial, especially if the person one is conferring with has experience with the problem at hand. For example, in order to be able to decide between continuing one's education after finishing four years of university studies and finding a job, it is helpful to talk to people who have made this decision. A person who decided to find gainful employment will probably give different advice than a person who decided to stay in school. Listening attentively to both will allow a person to make the best assessment of his/her own situation as he/she will be able to learn from others' experiences.
At the same time, one should consider the opinions and feelings of the people who will be impacted by his/her decision. For example, husband and wife should confer with each other before making up their mind to quit or change a job. After all, the change of a job can impact many aspects of their life together, such as the household income or the amount of time they can spend together.
However, one should not allow or even ask others to make an important decision on one's behalf. After all, he/she will be the one with all the information at his/her disposal, especially after seeking advice from others. Ultimately, the person who has to live with the decision (in so far as it is a personal decision that does not affect others directly in a significant way) should take complete responsibility and make it himself/herself.
55. 人们是否应该独自做重要决定?
重要的决定是指对人的一生产生重大或持久影响的决定。这类决定往往很难做出,因为它产生的结果很重要或者需要做出决定时的情况很复杂,牵涉到的事情很多。因此,人们向朋友家人咨询从而更好地了解情况。征询意见很有益处是因为能避免失误消除疏忽,但最终还是需要本人来做决定。
同他人讨论如何做出重要决定是有益的,特别是与你一起讨论事情的这个人对此类事情富有经验。例如,如果你不知道四年大学毕业后该考研究生还是该找工作,那么就找位曾经做出决定的人讨论这件事。已经找到丰厚报酬工作的人给的建议肯定与考取研究生的人给的建议不一样。注意倾听他们两方的建议,从他们的经验中对自己的情况做出评估。
同时,你应该考虑做出的决定能够影响到的他人的观点和感觉。例如,夫妻在辞职或者换工作之前应与对方协商。毕竟,工作的变化能够影响他们的共同生活,如家庭收入和他们在一起的时间等。
但是,你不能让别人代替你做出重要决定。毕竟,你自己拥有所有的信息,尤其是在咨询了很多人之后。最终,接受决定的人应负起全部责任,自己做出决定(我们谈论的决定是个人决定,并不会直接对他人产生重大影响)。
- lasting [ˈlæstiŋ] adj. 持久的,永恒的
- preclude [priˈklu:d] n. 避免;排除
- oftentimes [ˈɔfənˌtaimz] adv. 时常
- beneficial [benəˈfiʃəl] adj.有益的,受益的
- consequence [ˈka:nsiˌkwens]n. 结果,推论
- gainful [ˈgeinfəl] adj. 有利益的
- attentively [əˈtentivli] adv.注意的,留意的
- considerable [kənˈsidərəbəl]adj. 相当大的,值得考虑的
- confer [kənˈfə:] v. 协商,交换意见
- aspect [ˈæspekt] n. 方面;外表,面貌
- consult [kənˈsʌlt] v. 商量,商议
- household [ˈhaushəuld]adj. 家庭的,家族的
- pitfall [ˈpitˌfɔ:l]n. 缺陷;未料到的危险或困难
- disposal [diˈspəuzəl] n. 处理,处置;安排