NOOBLANG

The Perfect (Esoteric) Programming Language for Beginners

• ❌ No symbols (except ")
• ❌ No for, while loops, functions (too overwhelming for starters)
• ❌ No data structures like arrays (a pain to understand)
• ❌ No variable scoping rules and stuff
• ✔️ Everything done with ifs and procedures (running lines of code)

Examples

Prime numbers between 0 and 100:

x be 2                         
prime be yes                  
y be 1                     
y be y plus 1
run 8 to 11 if y is x      
prime be no if x mod y is 0
run 4 to 7
write x if prime 
x be x plus 1
end if x atleast 100
run 2 to 11

Most of the syntax shouldn't be hard to understand (they're designed for beginners), but in case you're wondering, run runs the line(s) of code with the given line number

So run 8 to 11 if y is x runs lines 8-11 if x is equal to y

Pascal's triangle

No arrays? Not a problem:

write "Enter number of rows (1 ~ 10): "
n be num read
run 25 to 26 if n mod 1 isnt 0 or n below 1 or n above 10
a be 1
i be 0
    s be ""
    j be i
    x be 0
    run 29 plus i
        run 20 to 23 if j is 0
        run j plus 38
        x be y
        run j plus 39
        x be x plus y
        run j plus 28
        s be s plus " " plus text x

        j be j minus 1
    run 10 to 19
    write s plus " 1"
    i be i plus 1
    end if i is n
run 6 to 23

write "Need integer between 1 and 10 inclusive"
run 1 to 23

a be x
b be x
c be x
d be x
e be x
f be x
g be x
h be x
k be x
l be x

y be a
y be b
y be c
y be d
y be e
y be f 
y be g
y be h
y be k
y be l

TODO

• Alphanumeric variable names
• Escape characters
• Tutorial/Docs (god damn)
• Prove turing completeness (Probably a brainf interpreter)
• Fix column numbers of errors
• Bytecode compiler? Nah, I don't have time